It is very common among women that if someone is speaking in favour of polygyny practice, they see the person as defending or supporting men.

They hardly see it as espousing the true message of Allah on the sensitive issue. Polygyny is both for the benefit of the men and women who practise it.

A lot of times the first wife stands to benefit a lot from polygyny because if the husband decides to do something for one of the wives, he is compelled to do same for all the wives in the spirit of justice and equality.

If the first wife has been overburdened before with cooking and incessant sexual demands, with the arrival of a second wife the burden will be shared automatically.

If the first wife has been starved of her sexual demands from the husband with excuses of weakness and tiredness, the situation will automatically improve when a new wife joins them because the husband will want to show his capability to justify his reason for going into the practice of polygyny.

But no matter how much you try to make women see reasons with what Allah, in His infinite wisdom, enjoined and permitted, some of them continue to see you as a male chauvinist but will never agree to be called feminists with their hostile views towards any man going into polygyny. Imagine all the requirements men are being asked to fulfill before they can be allowed to go into polygyny as if new revelation has descended on the topic.

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The fact is that some women detest polygyny so much that the least they expect from men who go into it is to apologise for going into it and make efforts to pacify and satisfy all her wishes for her to agree with the husband’s wish and not continue to be hostile towards him and his incoming wife. This looks like a kind of bribery or blackmail for doing what ordinarily is halal for both men and women to practise.

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May Allah save us from our self-inflicted trials and rectify our affairs. Amin